A Timely Reminder

Dear Ones -

The following was posted on my old blog site and spoke to my spirit today.  I feel like it is a timely reminder to share once more.

~ W

Reflections: Life’s Winding Road

October 02, 2009

I’m in a reflective mood today – probably as a result of this being October and the start of fall. I enjoy the feeling I get at this time of year. Can’t explain it – could be that October means that my favorite holiday isn’t too far away. No, it isn’t Halloween! My favorite holiday is Christmas. I’ve always gotten excited from October to December as far as I can recall. My fondest memories are from my childhood in Long Island, NY when we’d have snow and it really could have been a picture from Currier & Ives.

Another reason is that, including the first part of spring; this is a time where I find myself seriously reflecting on my life. Part of that comes from the fact that I do yearly newsletters to send with my Christmas cards to family and dear friends and I have literally 12 months of memories, achievements and so much more to share.

You could say that this time of year finds me looking at where the winding road of life as brought me from and where I am headed. I don’t look back so much to chastise myself, though I do have plenty of regrets and dreams that I didn’t fulfill. I think many of us find ourselves in this place. It’s not so much the looking at where I’ve been, but the looking forward – like the picture above – to see what lies ahead, within the view. There are still unknowns and bumps along the way; however, there is just something exciting about the journey. Like this quote I found, it eloquently says what I feel about this faith journey I am currently on:

“Faith isn’t the ability to believe long and far into the misty future. It’s simply taking God at His Word and taking the next step.” ~ Joni Erickson Tada

His Word says that He has plans for us to give us a hope and a future. What it doesn’t say is how long that future is. Our days are not ours; He has already set aside the number of days for each of us. When our number is called, that is it. Several years ago, I wouldn’t have cared about this fact. Since being saved by grace in 2000, all I desire is to know Him, to live my life in a manner that is pleasing in His sight (not the sight of man), to be a living testimony. The one hurdle I have had is growing in the faith.

It’s so much like when you are a child and you have growth spurts – you get growing pains. Your joints hurt, your bones feel like they are going to pop right through the skin. With faith, at least my experiences, I have felt like my heart was going to explode from the pain. See, my journey has taken some major turns that I couldn’t have foreseen at the time I was saved – starting with the demise of my marriage. I knew my marriage wasn’t stellar; but I still knew that running away wouldn’t solve any of the issues. I knew I was being abused; but I thought it was what I deserved. It was only after I knew that God didn’t design that for me that I realized a supernatural, spiritual change would have to occur to save my marriage. So I began praying for my husband, began steadfastly living my life in Christ around my husband hoping he’d be so hungry for the same and want to come to Christ too. The problem was/is – he doesn’t believe in God. I was unequally yoked. I had to step aside and let God take over. When decision to divorce was made, I did have a peace about it. So, I don’t regret the decision; I regret all the pain we both inflicted to each other during the marriage. Some things just can’t be taken back after they are said.

But then, there are the turns in the road that bring joy and blessing. If you’ve kept up, you have seen some really good stuff about Kimberly. There was a time when I was told that she’d never walk and that she would be delayed in ability to learn (I am now sure that the doc we had then in TX was not trustworthy or qualified to make those statements), so to have her physically growing into this beautiful young lady, who is WAY capable of learning and excelling, is truly a blessing. I love my baby girl very much and daily tell her this because I don’t want her to ever doubt that or think that I don’t. It goes back to earlier when I said we don’t know the number of our days – so I do my best to tell those I love how I feel and do at least one thing each day that gives God glory.

I am looking forward to the turns in the road that lie ahead. I am hopeful that on this journey – both life and faith – there will be happy surprises and realized goals. Oh, I know that I’ll still have the bumps and even big, gaping potholes from time to time; but I am equipped with the Master Navigator as my GPS and know that I can trust Him at all times. I don’t have to be anxious when sidelined on the side of the road or at those times when I am forced to stop. I know that these times of tribulation (also promised in the Word to occur) are only temporary and serve to grow me that much more. It has taken me a long time to accept that statement, and I am a little surprised that I even said it (much less shared with you!). You know what? Joy always comes in the morning!

I’m going to leave you now with another quote I found when searching for inspirational quotes on faith. I do hope your winding road and journey, whatever it is, is blessed and you find a way to be a blessing – no matter how little you may seem to think it may be, it counts largely.

“Faith is no irresponsible shot in the dark. It is a responsible trust in God, Who knows the desires of your hearts, the dreams you are given, and the goals you have set. He will guide your paths right.” ~ Unknown